Tuesday, March 9, 2010

A Dry Spell

I guess I either ran out of stories, or got tired of telling them. Life is going on in bus world as usual. Today a guy was trying to point the way to a blind lady carrying a white cane. I told him she couldn't see, and she said "I can see". Way to make me feel dumb!
Putting my foot in my mouth is a habit of mine. Apparently I like the taste of my own toes. So I might as well tell the story of the girl with the big feet.
This happened a long time ago, when San Diego Transit still operated the 115. I had a student driver that day, so I wasn't doing all the driving. As we arrived back at the bus at the El Cajon Terminal (from the restroom), there was a crowd of people waiting to board. One of them was a tall, overweight young woman dressed in jersey shorts and a T-shirt. No bra, and she needed one, but it was very hot that day. She was very chatty as we got on, and we were carrying on a conversation, probably about there being a student driver, but I don't really remember. She was seated behind the driver, and I was across from him, so I could see where we were going and make sure he didn't make a wrong turn. As we headed up Marshall, I noticed that the young woman's feet were so large that they stuck out halfway across the aisle. Like a dork, I blurted, "Damn, girl, you've got some BIG feet!" "Size 16. " came the reply, "And I'm a boy."
There is NOTHING like making a fool of yourself in front of a whole bunch of people. I could have died. In my defense, his voice hadn't changed, he didn't shave yet, and he really needed a bra. "Oh, you're young," I said, lodging my toenails more deeply into my tonsils. "That's why your voice hasn't changed yet". He was nineteen. I didn't know what to say after that, and honestly, I still don't. If I had been a passenger on the bus, I think I would have gotten off and waited for the next one. He didn't seem too disturbed, though. He continued talking to me about the place he lived, (a group home), and how he wanted to get a job. Finally, he got off, and I never saw him again. Whew!

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